Friderike Butler Mar 12, 2009:

overbearingly protective Nagging may be part of gängeln, but not necessarily so. It's really more the "I am superior than you and I have to show you how it's done, because you have no clue" attitude that is behind "gängeln". Can be with the best intentions, whereas nagging to me is more born out of the annoyance with the other person. Makes sense? I may well be overinterpreting this whole thing ;-)

Anne-Marie Grant (X) Mar 12, 2009:

Nag What about the verb 'to nag' for gängeln?

Anne-Marie Grant (X) Mar 11, 2009:

Thanks Friderike - that's a really useful explanation.

Friderike Butler Mar 11, 2009:

Of course you mean well and of course he feels ... "gängelt", because you believe you handle money better than he does ... and the parents know best what is best for their children and will let them know lovingly and persistently ;-)

Non-ProZ.com Mar 11, 2009:

I try to help him by looking objectively on the way the money was spent because I believe he simply wastes it...I am not patronizing him, but I kind of know by now he cannot handle money well...

Friderike Butler Mar 11, 2009:

But isn't that exactly like your friend felt? Patronized, talked down to, big-brothered, because he thought you wanted to get into his affairs and pass judgment on how he spent the money? Gängeln is more like trying to take over someone's life.

Martin Wenzel (asker) Mar 11, 2009:

Perhaps this wasn't the very best example for using the verb "gängeln". It arose in a discussion I had with my German friend, where I said I had sometimes given money to a Moroccan friend who blew it within two shakes of a lamb's tail. When I asked what he did use the money for, he got upset. On recounting this story to my friend...she said...klar, dass er so reagiert, er fühlt sich von dir gegängelt. Patronizing and henpecking doesn't seem quite right...To lead s.o. by the nose is "unterbuttern" in German or "jemanden nach seiner Pfeife tanzen lassen"...I think the"gängeln" used in the example is synonymous with the German "jemanden Rechenschaft ablegen lassen"...

Friderike Butler Mar 11, 2009:

@ Anne-Marie Gängeln as I understand it is very verbal and very hands on. Not just setting rules and expectations, but monitoring them closely, verbally and actively, coaxing, getting involved in little details, constantly commenting about progress (or shortcomings) - very annoying actually for teenagers and adults. Gängeln has its origin in "teaching how to walk" = gehen => gang => gängeln. Imagine a parent holding a little girl by both hands towering over her and talking her through every movement that she is supposed to make. The reins seem more passive going in the direction of keeping someone on a short leash. Not quite the same.

Anne-Marie Grant (X) Mar 11, 2009:

Reins Going back to Kim's leading by the nose suggestion, I think it didn't quite work for me because it made me think of leading an animal - I know it's only metaphorical, but anyway...I'm wondering now about child reins, which would keep the idea behind gängeln. For example...Her parents still have her on reins, as though she were a little child.